The luxury of being able to let go

The author reflects on their life experiences, notably the impact of a cancer diagnosis, and the peace found in letting go of attachments to specific outcomes.

They emphasize the importance of releasing emotional ties to the past and adopting a more carefree and relaxed state of being, akin to a character from a favorite franchise.

Amid challenges like a pandemic and personal health battles, they advocate for finding joy in the present and the simple pleasures of life, such as contemplating breakfast.

SEPT 9 — Much as I am loathe to admit it, it feels like my 40s are now separated by “BC/AC” or Before Cancer/After Cancer.

A pandemic, a new major war and a cancer diagnosis are not what I wanted to experience in the fourth decade of my life and now my fifty-something years loom ever closer.

Right now I feel a strange peace.

Now, I’m not about to proclaim that I have reached enlightenment or that I am a candidate for sainthood.

It’s far more mundane than that.

As I continue to spring clean my house, throwing away broken and un-giftable things, I find things I have no recollection of buying, no memory of why I wanted them in the first place.

Besides things I have also let go of something I think most people should learn to — an attachment to outcomes.

Or as Doris Day sang, que sera sera .

I think most people are unhappy because their life or even their sense of self does not conform to very specific notions.

Desire, I think, is a healthy thing and that desire is behind some of the most beautiful things we have but too much of it, twists those things into hideous transmogrifications.

We want what we want; over analyzing desire is a pointless exercise.

Yet I understand that for people in great pain or suffering, such as those living in countries at war, it cannot be easy or perhaps possible to live in a detachment to outcomes.

When you live in conflict, all you can hope for is for that conflict to end, and for you to survive until you see the fulfilment of that hope.

For those not in crisis it is a privilege then to be able to sit with yourself, to be able to look back on your past, your thoughts, your actions and release your emotional ties to them.

I sit on this computer and think, ah, my life has been beautiful. Today there has been occasion for joy. Tomorrow holds promise of more joy.

There is no joy in holding onto my sadness or my grievances and I do not know, but I can hope my cancer remains gone and that tomorrow I don’t get run over by a careless Malaysian driver.

I watched the Chiikawa movie again last week but only to collect the special merch from a screening.

The character I find most endearing in the franchise is Usagi, the rabbit-like creature who will suddenly burst into song or verse and somehow in the past few weeks I have accumulated quite a few mini Usagis.

When Usagi isn’t rapping or happily stuffing its face with food, it is content to just lie around, seeming aimless in its relaxation.

Yet Usagi is also brave, unashamed about expressing itself creatively, also a skilled hunter and diligent in skill-acquiring.

Containing multitudes, indeed.

So I’d rather like to be Usagi — being silly, prone to not taking myself too seriously, not caring to prove anything to anyone (besides myself)... isn’t that a nice state of being?

Before I go off and do some necessary laying about (I volunteered to do far too much writing), I hope that you too find something, some thought that can sustain you in this mad world we live in.

And if all else fails, lie down and let your mind be still and empty, thinking of nothing besides what would be nice for breakfast.

I suggest nasi lemak .

The summer movie season ends with two surprisingly very good blockbusters

The doctor from Pasar Road who wanted Malaysians (and everybody else) to be safe from nuclear war

Living with survivor’s guilt post-cancer

Negeri Sembilan MB denies Zahid involved in bid to remove Tuanku Muhriz

As Umno general assembly begins today, Malay unity, PAS-PN ties and the battle for Melaka set to dominate discussions

Malaysia’s SMART team arrives in Nepal disaster zone, begins drone reconnaissance

作者反思了自己的生活经历，特别是癌症诊断的影响，以及放下对特定结果的执念后所获得的平静。

他们强调要放下对过去的感情执念，像自己喜欢的角色一样，过上更加无忧无虑、轻松自在的生活。

在疫情和个人健康问题等挑战面前，他们提倡在当下寻找快乐和生活中的简单乐趣，例如细细品味早餐。

9 月 9 日——尽管我很不愿意承认，但感觉我的 40 多岁现在被“BC/AC”（癌症前/癌症后）分隔开了。

疫情、新的重大战争和癌症诊断，都不是我在人生第四个十年想要经历的事情，而现在，我的五十岁也越来越近了。

此刻我感到一种奇特的平静。

现在，我并不打算宣称我已经开悟，或者我是圣人的候选人。

事情远比这平淡得多。

当我继续进行春季大扫除，扔掉破损的和不适合送人的物品时，我发现了一些我完全不记得买过的东西，也想不起来当初为什么想要它们。

除了这些事情之外，我还放下了我认为大多数人都应该学会放下的东西——对结果的执着。

或者正如多丽丝·戴 (Doris Day) 所唱的那样，“que sera sera”。

我认为大多数人不快乐，是因为他们的生活甚至自我认知不符合某些特定的观念。

我认为欲望是健康的，一些最美好的事物都源于这种欲望，但欲望过盛，就会把这些事物扭曲成可怕的畸形。

我们想要什么就想要什么；过度分析欲望是毫无意义的。

但我理解，对于身处巨大痛苦或苦难中的人们，例如生活在战乱国家的人们，要对结果漠不关心，或许是件难事，甚至是不可能的。

当你生活在冲突之中时，你所能希望的只有冲突结束，以及你能活到希望实现的那一天。

对于那些没有陷入危机的人来说，能够静下心来与自己相处，回顾自己的过去、想法和行为，并放下与它们的情感联系，是一种难得的特权。

我坐在电脑前，心想，啊，我的人生真美好。今天有很多值得高兴的事。明天也充满希望，期待着更多的快乐。

沉溺于悲伤或怨恨之中并不能带来快乐，我不知道，但我可以希望我的癌症能够消失，也希望明天不会被粗心的马来西亚司机撞到。

我上周又看了一遍千川的电影，不过只是为了收集放映会的特别周边商品。

在这个系列作品中，我最喜欢的角色是兔兔，这只兔子会突然唱歌或吟诗，不知何故，在过去的几周里，我竟然收集了不少迷你兔兔。

当兔兔不唱歌或不开心地大吃大喝的时候，它就满足于躺着，放松得似乎漫无目的。

然而，兔兔也很勇敢，不羞于用创造力表达自己，也是一位技艺高超的猎人，并且在学习技能方面勤奋努力。

确实包罗万象。

所以我宁愿做兔兔——傻乎乎的，不太把自己当回事，不在乎向任何人（除了我自己）证明什么……这难道不是一种很好的状态吗？

在我去好好休息一下之前（我自愿承担了太多写作任务），我希望你们也能找到一些东西，一些想法，能够在我们所生活的这个疯狂世界里支撑你们。

如果其他方法都无效，那就躺下来，让你的思绪平静下来，什么也不想，只想着早餐吃什么好。

我推荐椰浆饭。

夏季档电影以两部出人意料的优秀大片落下帷幕

那位来自巴刹路的医生希望马来西亚人（以及其他所有人）免受核战争的威胁

癌症康复后如何面对幸存者内疚感

森美兰州议员否认阿末扎希参与罢免端姑慕里兹

巫统大会今日召开，马来团结、伊斯兰党与国民联盟的关系以及马六甲之争预计将成为讨论的焦点。

马来西亚SMART小组抵达尼泊尔灾区，开始无人机侦察