Dating apps are ditching ‘the swipe’ for meet-ups IRL

Anastasiia Voloshko/Moment RF/Getty Images

Rob Perez only has one dealbreaker when it comes to dating – his partner needs to be a gym rat like him.

“It doesn’t have to be the same sport, but… I think lifestyle-wise, (she has) to understand: I work out, you work out, we do our thing,” he tells CNN.

So when the 33-year-old content creator first heard about Surf – a dating app allowing users to filter matches based on their fitness habits – he was immediately intrigued. As an avid runner, he thoroughly enjoyed knowing that everyone on his screen might be up for joining him. No more “I have to figure out if they like this, and I have to figure out if they like this… It’s all listed right there, makes it pretty easy,” he says.

Surf is one of several dating apps eschewing endless swiping and encouraging potential matches to meet up in the real-world and share experiences together.

This comes as older, more established dating apps like Tinder are reckoning with a decline in paid subscribers. In August, Tinder’s parent company Match Group reported a 6% year-on-year drop in customers paying for its apps to 13.3 million across its portfolio, which includes Hinge, Match and OkCupid. Bumble, in the same month, saw its paid user base fall by 16.4% to 3.2 million, down from 3.8 million the previous year.

About 15 years ago, Tinder revolutionized the way we seek romance in the digital age. But as 78% of app users report burnout across the board and in-person dating events surge, the role of tech in our love lives is changing once again.

When a user downloads Surf, they’re presented with a scrollable grid of about 30 profiles and they don’t need to swipe left or right to move between them. Users can flag their passions and match with others based on theirs.

While founder and CEO Rob Long says users can bond over anything from pickleball to rosé, the app is best known for its partnership with Hyrox - an indoor fitness event combining running and other workout competitions. Users can see when others are in town to compete. This year, they were able to sign up for mixed doubles blind dates in a handful of global cities, from Sydney to NYC.

Dating Apps Were Never About Romance | Engagement Party | CNN Audio

Still, Surf is a minnow in the dating app market. Surf had only roughly 28,800 downloads worldwide in 2026, with monthly active users too low to track, according to a research firm Sensor Tower. However, it is growing quickly.

Perez was exhausted by repetitive dating profiles and wanted more information on potential matches.

“At one point, I know a lot of people were on Bumble, Tinder, and Hinge. They used all the same pictures, they used all the same prompts. It’s a rinse and repeat thing,” he says.

Perez is now in a committed, exclusive relationship with Grace, his mixed doubles partner from Surf’s Hyrox blind date in Ottawa. After finding someone who values exercise as much as he does, he wishes there were more apps directly arranging first dates.

An app from the Netherlands is doing just this. Breeze, founded in 2020 by a group of university students, doesn’t allow users to chat at all. Instead, the app gives them a time and a place to meet in one of its partner bars.

To avoid swipe fatigue, users get about seven profiles a day to choose from. Now, the app is organizing group dates for between 6 and 10 singles who can be selected based on shared interests.

“The hardest part of dating isn’t meeting people, it’s the pressure we’ve attached to it,” Breeze co-founder Marco van der Woude said in a statement. “A table of eight is a night out first and a date second. Worst case you have a fun evening, and best case you meet the love of your life.”

Even legacy dating apps are transforming. On Feeld, a dating app catering to ethical non-monogamy, polyamory and kink, users can sign up to do their hobbies as well as talk about them.

Where London has seen the app’s users bond over nostalgic arcade games, Los Angeles has seen them connect through bouldering, chess and hiking. The app has an events page, where it advertises group meet-ups from comedy nights to clubbing.

“There’s only so much you can do online,” Abigail Gaskin, Feeld’s Director of Brand Marketing, told CNN. “Dating apps are there for the initial connection, and then everything else should be about being in person, a meeting.”

Pointing to a “quiet disillusionment” with repetitive and transactional chat features, she says people are craving low-pressure physical spaces where they can meet people and explore common interests.

To Gaskin, the abundance of tech everywhere doesn’t help: “As we’ve become increasingly online as a society, there is that need for, I suppose, a little bit of friction - having to get up and get dressed and make your way somewhere and meet people.”

Every dating app, new and old, will have to keep up. Major player Bumble is trading its classic swipe to launch a feature setting up in-real-life dates. Tinder is launching an events page on its app.

“Nowadays people are much more discerning about how they spend their time and how they connect,” Gaskin said. “And it’s not just about swiping on a picture and liking it.”

Anastasiia Voloshko/Moment RF/Getty Images

罗布·佩雷斯在约会方面只有一个硬性要求——他的伴侣必须像他一样是个健身狂。

“不一定要是同一项运动，但是……我认为从生活方式上来说，（她）必须明白：我锻炼，你锻炼，我们做我们自己的事，”他告诉 CNN。

所以，当这位33岁的内容创作者第一次听说Surf——一款允许用户根据健身习惯筛选匹配对象的约会应用——时，他立刻就被吸引住了。作为一名跑步爱好者，他非常享受屏幕上的每个人都可能和他一起跑步的感觉。“再也不用费心琢磨他们喜不喜欢这个，喜不喜欢那个了……所有条件都一目了然，非常方便，”他说。

Surf 是众多约会应用程序之一，它摒弃了无休止的滑动操作，鼓励潜在的匹配对象在现实世界中见面，共同分享经历。

与此同时，像 Tinder 这样历史更悠久、更成熟的约会应用也面临着付费用户数量下降的困境。今年 8 月，Tinder 的母公司 Match Group 公布，旗下包括 Hinge、Match 和 OkCupid 在内的应用付费用户数量同比下降 6%，至 1330 万。同月，Bumble 的付费用户数量也下降了 16.4%，从去年的 380 万降至 320 万。

大约15年前，Tinder彻底改变了我们在数字时代寻找爱情的方式。但随着78%的应用程序用户普遍反映使用过度感到疲惫，以及线下约会活动激增，科技在我们爱情生活中的角色正在再次发生变化。

用户下载 Surf 后，会看到一个包含约 30 个个人资料的可滚动网格，无需左右滑动即可切换。用户可以标记自己的兴趣爱好，并根据这些爱好与其他用户进行匹配。

创始人兼首席执行官罗伯·朗表示，用户可以就从匹克球到桃红葡萄酒等各种话题进行交流，但这款应用最出名的是它与Hyrox的合作——Hyrox是一项室内健身活动，结合了跑步和其他健身比赛。用户可以查看其他参赛者何时在所在城市参赛。今年，他们还可以报名参加来自悉尼、纽约等多个国际城市的混合双打盲约比赛。

约会软件从来就与浪漫无关 | 订婚派对 | CNN音频

不过，Surf 在约会应用市场仍然只是个小角色。据市场研究公司 Sensor Tower 的数据显示，截至 2026 年，Surf 的全球下载量仅约为 28,800 次，月活跃用户数更是低到无法追踪。然而，它的增长速度却非常快。

佩雷斯厌倦了千篇一律的约会资料，想要了解更多关于潜在匹配对象的信息。

“我知道曾经有一段时间，很多人都在用 Bumble、Tinder 和 Hinge。他们用的照片都一样，用的开场白也一样。这完全是重复操作，”他说。

佩雷斯现在和格蕾丝是一对稳定的恋爱关系，格蕾丝是他在渥太华Surf's Hyrox相亲活动中认识的混双搭档。找到一个和他一样热爱运动的人后，他希望有更多应用程序可以直接安排初次约会。

一款来自荷兰的应用程序正是如此。这款名为Breeze的应用程序由一群大学生于2020年创立，它完全不允许用户聊天。相反，该应用程序会为用户安排时间和地点，让他们在合作酒吧见面。

为了避免用户过度滑动浏览，应用每天只提供大约七个个人资料供用户选择。现在，该应用还组织6到10位单身人士的集体约会，参与者可以根据共同兴趣进行选择。

Breeze联合创始人Marco van der Woude在一份声明中表示：“约会最难的不是认识人，而是我们赋予它的压力。八人桌首先是外出聚会，其次才是约会。最坏的情况是你度过了一个愉快的夜晚，最好的情况是你遇到了此生挚爱。”

就连传统的约会应用也在转型。在Feeld这款面向秉持伦理的非一夫一妻制、多角恋和性癖好的约会应用上，用户可以注册并从事自己的爱好，也可以谈论这些爱好。

在伦敦，这款应用的用户们通过怀旧的街机游戏建立联系；而在洛杉矶，他们则通过抱石、下棋和徒步旅行等活动相聚。该应用还设有活动页面，发布各种团体聚会信息，从喜剧之夜到夜店狂欢，应有尽有。

Feeld品牌营销总监阿比盖尔·加斯金告诉CNN：“网上能做的事情毕竟有限。约会软件的作用在于建立初步联系，之后的一切都应该以线下见面为主。”

她指出，人们对重复性和交易性的聊天功能感到“悄然失望”，渴望在轻松的实体空间里与人见面，探索共同的兴趣。

在加斯金看来，科技的普及无济于事：“随着我们这个社会越来越依赖网络，我想，我们需要一些摩擦——比如起床、穿衣、前往某个地方、与人见面。”

所有约会应用，无论新旧，都必须与时俱进。主流应用 Bumble 正在放弃传统的滑动匹配方式，推出线下约会安排功能。Tinder 也将在其应用内推出活动页面。

“如今，人们对如何度过时间和如何与人交往更加谨慎，”加斯金说。“这不再只是滑动图片点赞那么简单了。”